Burn like love, and love like fire

we are most easily annoyed and angry at the people we love the most

because we expect so much from them

it hurts to be disappointed by them 

because we know that we would do anything to not disappoint them

but that's love

to be utterly frustrated by someone and adore them anyway

Good morning.

A month and one week into my study-hiatus. A month and two weeks more to go. I haven't accomplished much, nor had my days been very exciting, but I'm not complaining. I am well aware that this is probably my final real holiday for (maybe) the rest of my life. Once my five-year degree course starts, there's practically zero break. Not a break like this anyway. And obligation-less holidays will not ever exist after that. No matter how long ahead I've planned a holiday, it will still be subjected to change, I will still have things to worry about, until the day I decided to forgo my practice, which will be in the far far future, so let's not think about that first.

I like my life now.

Wake up, have breakfast with my parents (sometimes alone if I wake up late), read the news, check the social media, do the breakfast dishes, go to the club to exercise (trying to hit 5 days a week), come home to shower, pick up my siblings from school, come home to lunch all ready on the dining table, lunch with the family, do the lunch dishes, take in the laundry, fold and iron the laundry, spend my afternoon in front of my computer watching Suits, go out for impromptu coffee sessions, run errands with mom (sometimes alone if she has work), send and pick up my siblings (tuition classes), help out with dinner, have dinner, dishes, family outing for groceries, or sometimes just stay home, 9.30pm drama, Skype call, sleep, and sometimes football if it's worth watching.

It's a routine, and honestly, I feel like I'll never run out of things to do. Maybe that's how it feels like being a stay-at-home housewife... lol... I guess I feel accomplished because I know that whatever I'm up to, I'm doing it for the family, something I haven't been doing for a year and a half and won't be doing for the next five years. That's why I'm only limiting all my outings to after lunch, or after dinner.

And I know that after the next two weeks I'll have to start prepping and shopping for my move back to KL. It sucks, being aware that my stay here is so temporary. This house feels like a holiday villa, where everything is so optimum, at my service, for my disposal. But also, I miss having things to be busy over. I don't know what I want.